Madi's First Letter!!

Dear Family,
So I have an email account now! madisonbeckstead@myldsmail.net
How exciting! Everything is going great here at the MTC. Here is our rough schedule:

6:20- Awaken.
6:30- Go to gym.
6:30-7:20- Play volleyball. Get a ball spiked into my face by a hardcore Phillipino guy who has apparently been called to the "Kick-everyone's-trash-at-volleyball-and-give-them-bloody-noses-during-gym-time" mission. Hang out in the sports medicine people's office where my old roommate Ellisha works.
8:15- Breakfast. Cracked wheat and hard-boiled eggs for me. Play a game with the Elders wherein we smack each others' eggs and see whose will be the last to break (we get really bored. There are many games like this.)
8:45- Personal study. Currently studying in Acts.
9:45- Class. Learn things in Portuguese with my teachers Irmao Campbell and Irmao Harmon. Sing the pirate hymn with Irmao Harmon (there is a hymn that only exists in Portuguese that is stinking awesome and sounds like a pirate song.)
11:45- Go to the Proselyting Center. Chat online with someone who hates the Church and wants to argue about polygamy.
1:00- Lunch. Play a game with the elders wherein we try to flip our cups upside down whilst retaining the liquid therein.
1:45- Class. Continue to learn. Also sing a lot. Also pray a lot. In Portuguese, always.
6:00- Dinner. Play a game with the elders wherein we tally who has received the most letters. Currently the record for the most mail in one day is 12 letters and 2 packages. Also currently, I hold the record for least amount of mail. Do not feel bad. I know you love me. And most of the elders have girlfriends anyway, so, lame. Also during dinner on certain choice nights, we are treated with a visit from Brother Aidukaitis of our branch presidency. He is a long talker and we are usually hours late to whatever is next when we are caught talking with him. He's cool, though. He looks like Pres. Monson and is from Brazil and used to be a mish pres. there.
6:45- Companion study.
7:45- Language study.
8:30- Portuguese tutor or teach our progressing investigator (one of the teachers who is playing an investigator for us so we can practice teaching one person all the lessons.)
9:00- Planning
9:25- Sing "Secreta Oracao" with our zone and go back to our rooms.
10:00- Usually in bed, though technically bedtime is 10:30.

That is the fascinating life of a missionary. Time is passing by really fast here and it seems like we just barely had a P-day. There are some secular things of which I wish to write, but to make them less "Babylon", I will try to write them like unto Nephi:

And it came to pass that my hair grew exceedingly curly. And so curly was it that I was compelled to use many headbands in the control thereof. And now, I thought it expedient to wear an oversized sweater on pday; and I further thought it expedient to wear a headband, yea, a headband white like unto a sweatband. And behold, I did appear as Jennifer Gray in Flashdance; and I did receive much tauntings from my brethren.
And it came to pass that I awoke; and my companion said, Look! And I did look, and I beheld that I had been afflicted in the night with a sore affliction, for I beheld that I had a cold sore. And lo, I was sore upset, for I had labored much in all my days to avoid the getting of a coldsore. And I had refused to keep company with those afflicted with this curse. And behold, I thought perhaps it was a zit, but lo and woe, it was not. And I did labor much that I might not pick it, but it came to pass that I did pick and it did grow much in its hideousness.
And it came to pass that my companions began to be desirous to punch one another; and they did speak many hard words one to another, and also to me, their sister. And behold, I, Irma Beckstead, was desirous that we should all get along. Nevertheless, I did not delight in having many companionship inventories during the course of our days; for behold, we were led to shed many tears over the hard words that were spoken. And verity, verily, I say unto you, that girls are weird, despite their being missionaries.
And it came to pass that my zone did become afflicted with the dread gamboo. And we were taken with much coughing and all manner of sore throats. And we did blow our noses much; and yea, so much did we blow our noses that mine began to bleed. And behold, this was ridiculous.
And it came to pass that I did see Dakota Atkinson oft, for he did work in my building; yea, he did clean and I did want to give him a hug, but verily, I would not.
And it came to pass that we did attend many devotionals and meetings in the course of our days. And we did behold Susan Tanner, for verily, she was our Relief Society teacher. And we did also behold Lowell M. Snow and other brethren from the Seventy. And I did sing at the choir in these meetings, despite the dread gamboo making my voice exceedingly harsh to behold. And Bro. Brenchley did teach us. And the elders did line up outside the building where devotionals were held for hours before the meetings, for verily there were rumors that an apostle was coming, for behold, we had labored many days without the hearing of an apostle; yea, many more days than are normal for the MTC. And we did anticipate with much gladness the coming of the Prophet around General Conference time, but behold, this was all speculation.

Ok, I've got to stop! The clock on this computer is ticking- literally! It's freaking me out. I hope you're all doing well! I'm learning lots. I love you!

Love,
Madi